DaiSan Posted October 18, 2011 Share Posted October 18, 2011 Question: How do you tell the difference between a British Police Officer, an Australian Police Officer and an American Police Officer? Answer: First - Lets pose the following question: You're on duty by yourself walking on a deserted street late at night. Suddenly, an armed man with a huge knife comes around the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, raises the knife, and lunges at you.You are carrying a Glock .40, and you are an expert shot, however you have only a split second to react before he reaches you. What do you do? BRITISH POLICE OFFICER: Firstly the officer must consider the man's Human Rights. 1) Does the man look poor or oppressed? 2) Is he newly arrived in this country and does not yet understand the law? 3) Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack? 4) Am I dressed provocatively? 5) Could I run away? 6) Could I possibly swing my gun like a club and knock the knife out of his hand? 7) Should I try and negotiate with him to discuss his wrong doings? 8) Does the Glock have appropriate safety built into it? 9) Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message does this send to society? 10) Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to wound me? 11) If I were to grab his knees and hold on, would he still want to stab and kill me? 12) If I raise my gun and he turns and runs away, do I get blamed if he falls over, knocks his head and kills himself? . 13) If I shoot and wound him, and lose the subsequent court case, does he have the opportunity to sue me, cost me my job, my credibility and the loss of my family home? AUSTRALIAN POLICE OFFICER: BANG! AMERICAN POLICE OFFICER: BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! 'click'.... (Sergeant arrives at scene later and remarks: 'Nice grouping!) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
custard~SPARTA~ Posted October 18, 2011 Share Posted October 18, 2011 I lol'd Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hunter~SPARTA~ Posted October 18, 2011 Share Posted October 18, 2011 A little different than I usually hear it. Heard a few other very similar ones, but usually its a "Republican" vs. a "Democrat". - JHunter Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Halli~SPARTA~ Posted October 18, 2011 Share Posted October 18, 2011 What a 12 shot mag???? Haha Probably just 3 Bangs one to the head two to the chest. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
peter~SPARTA~ Posted October 19, 2011 Share Posted October 19, 2011 Chk who have lowest crime rate...... Then laugh Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zeno~SPARTA~ Posted October 19, 2011 Share Posted October 19, 2011 Who cares, thats a good one and I am laughing. Its not about crime rates, Britain is blighted by health and safety. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MedicSN6 Posted October 19, 2011 Share Posted October 19, 2011 Welcome to America, where we shoot first and maybe we'll ask questions if we think we'll win the argument. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Steel~Sparta~ Posted October 19, 2011 Share Posted October 19, 2011 Who cares, thats a good one and I am laughing. Its not about crime rates, Britain is blighted by health and safety. +1 to my friend from the blighted country across the sea. I lol'd too Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
T_1 Posted October 19, 2011 Share Posted October 19, 2011 So, did the 'British' cop shoot him or not? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KalXen~SPARTA~ Posted October 19, 2011 Share Posted October 19, 2011 So, did the 'British' cop shoot him or not? Queue up to file a form, and we'll get back to you with the information in 6-8 weeks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OrcFace_McStompYou Posted October 19, 2011 Share Posted October 19, 2011 Chk who have lowest crime rate...... Then laugh I did, then I lol'd harder. http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1196941/The-violent-country-Europe-Britain-worse-South-Africa-U-S.html Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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