Athlon64~SPARTA~ Posted December 2, 2009 Share Posted December 2, 2009 If you are 30 or older you will think this is hilarious!!!! When I was a kid, adults used to bore me to tears with their tedious diatribes about how hard things were. When they were growing up; what with walking Twenty-five miles to school every morning.... Uphill... barefoot... BOTH ways Yadda, yadda, yadda And I remember promising myself that when I grew up, there was no way in hell I was going to lay a bunch of crap like that on my kids about how hard I had it and how easy they've got it! But now that... I'm over the ripe old age of thirty, I can't help but look around and notice the youth of today. You've got it so easy! I mean, compared to my childhood, you live in a damn Utopia! And I hate to say it, but you kids today, you don't know how good you've got it! I mean, when I was a kid we didn't have The Internet. If we wanted to know something, we had to go to the damn library and look it up ourselves, in the card catalogue!! There was no email!! We had to actually write somebody a letter - with a pen! Then you had to walk all the way across the street and put it in the mailbox and it would take, like, a week to get there! Stamps were 10 cents! Child Protective Services didn't care if our parents beat us. As a matter of fact, the parents of all my friends also had permission to kick our ass! Nowhere was safe! There were no MP3' s or Napsters! If you wanted to steal music, you had to hitchhike to the damn record store and shoplift it yourself! Or you had to wait around all day to tape it off the radio and the DJ would usually talk over the beginning and @#*% it all up! There were no CD players! We had tape decks in our car. We'd play our favorite tape and "eject" it when finished and the tape would come undone. Cause - that's how we rolled, dig? We didn't have fancy crap like Call Waiting! If you were on the phone and somebody else called they got a busy signal, that's it! And we didn't have fancy Caller ID either! When the phone rang, you had no idea who it was! It could be your school, your mom, your boss, your bookie, your drug dealer, a collections agent, you just didn't know!!! You had to pick it up and take your chances, mister! We didn't have any fancy Sony Playstation video games with high-resolution 3-D graphics! We had the Atari 2600! With games like 'Space Invaders' and 'Asteroids'. Your guy was a little square! You actually had to use your imagination!! And there were no multiple levels or screens, it was just one screen... forever! And you could never win. The game just kept getting harder and harder and faster and faster until you died! Just like LIFE! You had to use a little book called a TV Guide to find out what was on! You were screwed when it came to channel surfing! You had to get off your ass and walk over to the TV to change the channel! NO REMOTES!!! There was no Cartoon Network either! You could only get cartoons on Saturday Morning. Do you hear what I'm saying!?! We had to wait ALL WEEK for cartoons, you spoiled little rat-bastards! And we didn't have microwaves, if we wanted to heat something up we had to use the stove! Imagine that! That's exactly what I'm talking about! You kids today have got it too easy. You're spoiled. You guys wouldn't have lasted five minutes back in 1980 or before! Regards, The Over 30 Crowd (Send this to someone you'd like to make smile, Whether they are under 30 or not.) = Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stang~SPARTA~ Posted December 2, 2009 Share Posted December 2, 2009 AND THAT'S HOW THE FIGHT STARTED One year, a husband decided to buy his mother-in-law a cemetery plot as a Christmas gift. The next year, he didn't buy her a gift. When she asked him why, he replied, "Well, you still haven't used the gift I bought you last year!" And that's how the fight started..... ************************************************************************ My wife walked into the den & asked "Whats on the tv?" I replied "Dust". And that's how the fight started..... ************************************************************************ A woman is standing nude, looking in the bedroom mirror. She is not happy with what she sees and says to her husband, 'I feel horrible; I look old, fat and ugly. I really need you to pay me a compliment.' The husband replies, 'Your eyesight's damn near perfect.' And that's how the fight started..... ************************************************************************ My wife was hinting about what she wanted for our upcoming anniversary. She said, 'I want something shiny that goes from 0 to 200 in about 3 seconds. I bought her a scale. And that's how the fight started..... ************************************************************************ I asked my wife, 'Where do you want to go for our anniversary?' It warmed my heart to see her face melt in sweet appreciation. 'Somewhere I haven't been in a long time!' she said. So I suggested, 'How about the kitchen?' And that's when the fight started.... ************************************************************************ My wife and I are watching Who Wants To Be A Millionaire while we were in bed. I turned to her and said, 'Do you want to have sex?' 'No,' she answered. I then said, 'Is that your final answer?' She didn't even look at me this time, simply saying 'Yes.' So I said, 'Then I'd like to phone a friend.' And that's when the fight started.... ************************************************************************ I tried to talk my wife into buying a case of Miller Light for $14.95. Instead, she bought a jar of cold cream for $7.95. I told her the beer would make her look better at night than the cold cream. And that's when the fight started..... ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ I took my wife to a restaurant. The waiter, for some reason, took my order first. 'I'll have the strip steak, medium rare, please.' He said, 'Aren't you worried about the mad cow?' 'Nah, she can order for herself.' And that's when the fight started..... When I got home last night, my wife demanded that I take her someplace expensive .... so, I took her to a gas station..... and then the fight started.... ************************************************** ********************** After retiring, I went to the Social Security office to apply for Social Security. The woman behind the counter asked me for my driver's license to verify my age. I looked in my pockets and realized I had left my wallet at home. I told the woman that I was very sorry, but I would have to go home and come back later. The woman said, 'Unbutton your shirt'. So I opened my shirt revealing my curly silver hair. She said, 'That silver hair on your chest is proof enough for me' and she processed my Social Security application. When I got home, I excitedly told my wife about my experience at the Social Security office. She said, 'You should have dropped your pants. You might have gotten disability, too' And then the fight started..... ************************************************** ********************* My wife and I were sitting at a table at my high school reunion, and I kept staring at a drunken lady swigging her drink as she sat alone at a nearby table. My wife asked,' Do you know her? 'Yes,' I sighed, 'She's my old girlfriend. I understand she took to drinking right after we split up those many years ago, and I hear she hasn't been sober since.' 'My God!' says my wife, 'Who would think a person could go on celebrating that long?' And then the fight started..... ************************************************** ********************* I rear-ended a car this morning. So, there we were alongside the road and slowly the other driver got out of his car. You know how sometimes you just get soooo stressed and little things just seem funny? Yeah, well I couldn't believe it.... he was a DWARF!!! He stormed over to my car, looked up at me, and shouted, 'I AM NOT HAPPY!!!' So, I looked down at him and said, 'Well, then which one are you?' And that's how the fight started..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fatal_Papercut~SPARTA~ Posted December 2, 2009 Share Posted December 2, 2009 If you are 30 or older you will think this is hilarious!!!! ... We didn't have any fancy Sony Playstation video games with high-resolution 3-D graphics! We had the Atari 2600! With games like 'Space Invaders' and 'Asteroids'. Your guy was a little square! You actually had to use your imagination!! And there were no multiple levels or screens, it was just one screen... forever! And you could never win. The game just kept getting harder and harder and faster and faster until you died! Just like LIFE! ... Hah! You 30-year-olds are spoiled! At least you HAD video games! We had to play BOARD (aka bored) games with things like DICE! When you wanted to move something, you couldn't just click on a mouse; first you had to roll some dice to see how far you could move, and then you had to MANUALLY move your piece the appropriate number of spaces! And you had to keep track of your own money as well! You had to count it out and do things like ADDITION and SUBTRACTION when you bought or sold things, there was no computer to do it automatically for you! And when your game was over, you couldn't hit the off switch, you had to pick up all the pieces and cards and what-nots and organize them into their proper holding spaces/baggies etc, that way it would only take you one hour to set up the game the next time instead of two hours. Thirty-year-old crybabies! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Watchman~SPARTA~ Posted December 2, 2009 Share Posted December 2, 2009 Hah! You 30-year-olds are spoiled! At least you HAD video games! We had to play BOARD (aka bored) games with things like DICE! When you wanted to move something, you couldn't just click on a mouse; first you had to roll some dice to see how far you could move, and then you had to MANUALLY move your piece the appropriate number of spaces! Thirty-year-old crybabies! Risk is hands down, the best god-damned game ever invented! Still have mine and even though the box is worn to "falling apart", it still has all the bits. Once played for two days straight, using the pieces from three games, man those were epic battles!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Skaz~SPARTA~ Posted December 2, 2009 Share Posted December 2, 2009 i'm from the 80's, laughing my ass off Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GySgt~SPARTA~ Posted December 3, 2009 Share Posted December 3, 2009 hey im loving 35 ahhaha... Remember when starts now.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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