Kiwi~SPARTA~

Is it possible that I've put a quote that no-one can get. Maybe you better put in the answer Zeno.

Not Batman Begins.

I use a map. I don't like sat nav, there's nothing worse than a woman telling you where to go.

I bought Thunderpants on DVD for the kids, you know what boys think of toilet humour. Mash. No point in mentioning these bats, I thought. Poor bastard will see them soon enough.

Ghostbusters. You are singing the high bit... with your arse?

Face Off. Can a heart still break after it's stopped beating?

Hope you get better real quick. Haven't spoken to you for a long time.

Reservoir Dogs. This is an intergalactic emergency. I need to commandeer your vessel to Sector 12. Who's in charge here?

What do you mean, there's loads of funny ones. usthomsen SPARTA A Ahem Snot Spurts A Masher Nuts Tops A Smasher Nut Spot A Shame Runt Stops A Mashes Porn Tuts A Shames Nut Sport A Sharpest Mounts And thats just a few of the hundreds I found.

Happy Birthday Gomer.

What he's not telling you is that the two red bikes are for show & he races the little black one on the far left of the first photo.

A Ripsaw Kit A Paw Kit Sir A Raw Ski Pit

Hope all goes well & stay safe.

Have you seen the recent news bulletin? "Terrorists abduct bus load of attorneys." Note from terrorists: "Unless you meet our demands, we will release one hostage a day!"

Two lawyers had been stranded on a desert island for several months. The only other thing on the island was a tall coconut tree, which provided them their food. Each day one of the lawyers would climb to the top of the tree to see if he could see a rescue boat coming. One day, the lawyer yelled down from the tree, "WOW, I can't believe my eyes. There is a girl out there floating in our direction." The lawyer on the ground was most skeptical and said. "I think you're hallucinating and you've finally lost your mind." But within a few minutes, up to the beach floated a naked blond woman, face up and totally unconscious. The two lawyers went over to her, dragged her up on the beach, and discovered, yes, she was alive. One said the other, "You know, we've been on this island for months now without a woman. It's been such a long time. Do you think we should, ......you know, ... screw her?" The second lawyer, asked, "Out of What?"

A tax inspector has come to a synagogue to make sure it is paying it's taxes and is well run economically. He and the Rabbi are walking along and they see people making challa, a Jewish bread eaten on the Sabbath. The tax collector says, "Rabbi, every Sabbath, you must have some extra dough. What do you do with it?" The Rabbi responds, "We send it to the dough shop, and every year they send us a few batches of dough." They keep walking along, and they see someone lighting Sabbath candles. the tax collector says to the Rabbi, "Rabbi, every Sabbath, you must have some extra wax. What do you do with it?" The rabbi responds, "We send it to the candle-makers, and every year, they send us a new box." The tax collector is quite pleased by now that the place is running well, but he still needs the taxes. He prepares to ask the Rabbi for the money, but then they pass a baby being circumcised, and the collector has one more question. "Rabbi, after every circumcision, what do you do with the tips of the penises?" The Rabbi sighs and calmly responds, "We send them to the IRS, and every year they send us a prick like you."

A very shy guy goes into a bar and sees a beautiful woman sitting at the bar. After an hour of gathering up his courage he finally goes over to her and asks, tentatively, "Um, would you mind if I chatted with you for a while?" She responds by yelling, at the top of her lungs, "No, I won't sleep with you tonight!" Everyone in the bar is now staring at them. Naturally, the guy is hopelessly and completely embarrassed and he slinks back to his table. After a few minutes, the woman walks over to him and apologizes. She smiles at him and says, "I'm sorry if I embarrassed you. You see, I'm a graduate student in psychology and I'm studying how people respond to embarrassing situations." To which he responds, at the top of his lungs, "What do you mean $200!?!"

I hope you're gonna give it back when you've finished with it.

If you want independent suspension, try this.

I thought you were a gentleman Zeno.

It was opening night at the Orpheum and the Amazing Eileen was topping the bill. People came from miles around to see the famed hypnotist do her stuff. As the Amazing Eileen took to the stage, she announced, "Unlike most stage hypnotists who invite two or three people up onto the stage to be put into a trance, I intend to hypnotize each and every member of the audience." The excitement was almost electric as the Amazing Eileen withdrew a beautiful antique pocket watch from her coat. "I want you each to keep your eye on this antique watch. It's a very special watch. Its been in my family for six generations." She began to swing the watch gently back and forth while quietly chanting, "Watch the watch, watch the watch, watch the watch.... " The crowd became mesmerized as the watch swayed back and forth, light gleaming off its polished surface. Hundreds of pairs of eyes followed the swaying watch, until suddenly it slipped from the hypnotist's fingers and fell to the floor, breaking into a hundred pieces. "Shit," said the hypnotist. It took three weeks to clean up the theatre.

What vid got deleted? It seems that the picture I posted violates photobuckets terms.

You should never ask a lady that Postal. This should keep you guessing though.